


Protective

by blaiddseren



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: AU, Basically wolfstar being parental, Drarry, M/M, Overprotective Remus, Overprotective Sirius, Post War AU, Suicide Attempt Mention, Unforgivable Curses, self harm mention, wolfstar
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-03-13
Updated: 2017-03-13
Packaged: 2018-10-04 06:36:45
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 12,955
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10270457
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/blaiddseren/pseuds/blaiddseren
Summary: To say that Sirius was surprised to have his godson’s front door opened by Draco Malfoy, wearing nothing but a pair of black boxer shorts and one of Harry’s gryffindor quidditch shirts, was an understatement; the shirt was the only thing stopping Sirius hexing him on sight, as an uncomfortable realisation of why the boy was wearing it hit him.





	1. Chapter 1

To say that Sirius was surprised to have his godson’s front door opened by Draco Malfoy, wearing nothing but a pair of black boxer shorts and one of Harry’s gryffindor quidditch shirts, was an understatement; the shirt was the only thing stopping Sirius hexing him on sight, as an uncomfortable realisation of why the boy was wearing it hit him. Malfoy gaped at Sirius, his eyes wide with panic, and Sirius raised a questioning eyebrow, his fingers finding his wand; he was just about to hex the man anyway when he heard Harry’s voice. “Is it Ron? Tell him I’ll be two seconds.” 

“No it’s…” Malfoy floundered and if Sirius hadn’t been so furious he would have laughed. 

“It’s your godfather.” Sirius he supplied loudly, before adding “Maybe let me in?” A little more quietly to the blonde who was still blinking up at him in surprise.

“Yeah.” Malfoy breathed after a moment as he moved backwards and Sirius stepped into the flat, listening to the sound of Harry swearing and stumbling around his bedroom, presumably getting dressed. Sirius didn’t have long. He closed the front door and within a split second he had his wand pressed into Malfoy's chest. 

“What do you want with my godson?” 

“What? I -”

“Are you still practicing dark magic?”

“I never -”

“Are you part of that gang that are still threatening him even though Voldemort’s dead?” Sirius demanded, fury coursing through him. “Is this part of some plan?!”

“No!” Malfoy choked out, he looked terrified but then a strange look crossed his face, a combination of concern and irritation, “They’re threatening him? He didn’t say…” 

“He’s been getting death threats for months, then he was sent a parcel with a cursed object in.” Sirius jabbed his wand a little harder into the man’s chest, “Was it you? Your friends?”

“No!” Draco insisted, his eyes never leaving Sirius’ even when they heard the bedroom door open. 

“Sirius!” Harry snapped, shoving his godfather’s arm away from Malfoy and grabbing his wand, “Really?! There’s being overprotective and then there’s accusing the poor man of trying to kill me.”

Sirius opened his mouth to reply but Malfoy got there first, “Why the hell did you not tell me about the threats?” He asked, his voice low and tense, his eyes firmly on Harry now, ignoring the fact that Sirius was still stood in front of him. 

“It’s not a big deal.”

Malfoy’s eyes narrowed and Sirius felt for the first time that maybe just maybe the man wasn’t here on an ulterior motive.“Ha-”

“We’ll talk about it later.” Harry interrupted and Sirius watched as the two stared at each other for a minute before Malfoy’s shoulders slumped and he nodded, ducking away from Sirius and down the hall. “I thought you weren’t back until tomorrow.” Harry said after a moment, moving into the kitchen and tossing Sirius’ wand down on the side.

“We wanted to surprise you.” Sirius said, really wishing he’d just sent an owl.

Harry nodded, filling up the kettle and casting a boiling charm on it as he fetched some mugs from the cupboard and added instant coffee.“How’s Remus?” 

“Fine, he’s asleep. Think the international flooing was a bit much for him.” Sirius said casually, sitting down at the small dining table, “Harry…” 

Harry sighed loudly, pouring out the boiling water into the two mugs and handing one to Sirius before adding milk to his own, “It’s been about a month.” He said quietly and Sirius felt something tighten in his chest that his godson had kept it quiet for so long, “I was going to tell you but with Moony being sick and you guys going away… and I knew you’d be like this.” Harry added, a hint of anger creeping through.

“Can you blame me?” Sirius snapped, “He’s a death eater, he took that mark and -”

“He was just a kid! He was fucking scared Sirius. Just like…” Harry trailed off then but Regulus’ name hung silently in the air between them sending a wave of pain through Sirius’ chest, “Just like the rest of us. Draco did what he had to do to keep his family alive. He is not a bad person.” 

Sirius gritted his teeth, wondering, not for the first time, why his godson always had to insist on seeing the good in people, “He only got off at the trial because you…” He paused then, realising that this was yet another thing they had never fully discussed, he knew Harry had given evidence in the Malfoys favour but the trial had been closed and Harry had refused to talk about it afterwards. 

“I just told the truth Sirius.” Harry whispered after a moment, “When we… when we ended up in Malfoy Manor.” His voice shook and Sirius opened his mouth tell him that it was okay, that he didn’t have to do this, but Harry shook his head quietly. “Bellatrix asked Draco if it was me, because my face was all swollen, and he told her he didn’t know. Even though it was bloody clear it was me.” Harry was still whispering and Sirius wondered why until he saw the man glancing towards the kitchen door, checking that Malfoy wasn’t close enough to hear, “He looked terrified Sirius, even more scared than we were…” Harry paused again, rubbing has hand across his face, “Draco Malfoy is a lot of things but evil is not one of them. He took the mark because he had to.” 

They were quiet for a moment, listening to the sounds of Malfoy moving around in the bedroom, and Sirius contemplated Harry’s words; his mind returning to Regulus causing the usual guilt to sit heavier on his chest. He swigged from his coffee using the burn on his tongue to distract himself from those thoughts “How did it even start?” 

“We bumped into him and Parkinson at that new club in Diagon Alley.” Harry said and Sirius frowned at that, Harry was supposed to be keeping a low profile. “Some asshole was having a go at them, saying they weren’t welcome and Hermione got angry about that so… we just ended up talking to them.”

“And you realised he was a lovely boy now?” Sirius asked sarcastically, hating himself for it as a shadow of hurt crossed his godson’s face. 

“No, he came home with me… we were really drunk, we said it would be a one time thing.” Harry admitted, grimacing as he spoke and Sirius rolled his eyes, out of everyone Harry could have taken home for a one night stand…“We talked the next day and then just carried on from there.” 

“I thought we’d agreed you weren’t going to go out drinking until we’d figured out who was threatening you.” Sirius said quietly, his irritation returning as Harry rolled his eyes, “Harry someone wants you dead!”

“Someone has wanted me dead since I was born!” Harry snapped, “I can’t keep hiding away being scared Sirius; I can’t live my life like that. I thought you of all people would understand.” 

It was a low blow but it worked and Sirius found himself feeling guilty for being so hard on his godson, “We just worry about you.” 

Harry smiled then, “and I love you for it Sirius, I really do. But you have to learn to trust me to make my own choices.” 

“I do trust you!” Sirius protested, letting out a huff of air as Harry shook his head.

The younger man ran his hand over his face, looking contemplative as he opened his mouth and Sirius waited, not sure if he wanted to hear what was coming next; he was almost grateful when the sound of the doorbell interrupted whatever Harry had been about to say and they both looked up as the door to the bedroom creaked open, “Is it safe me to answer the door?” Malfoy asked in an amused tone as he walked past the kitchen door, now fully dressed thankfully, “Weasley, perfect timing.” Malfoy said as he opened the front door, Sirius couldn’t quite make out what was said next but a moment later Ron appeared in the kitchen doorway. 

“I’m gonna take Draco to the pub as planned. Let you guys talk.” He told Harry, his eyes only briefly flickering towards Sirius. “Otherwise Zabini’ll come looking for us.”

Harry gave a small nod, “Thanks Ron. I’ll just…” he trailed off, rising from the table and sliding past his friend; Sirius could hear him talking to Draco but he couldn't quite make out the words and he sighed, wondering what the fuck he was meant to do now. 

He looked up as Ron cleared his throat and the younger man grinned at him, taking a glass from the cupboard and filling it with water. “Alright Sirius? How’s Remus? Harry said the potion trial seemed positive.” 

“Last full moon was a lot less taxing.” Sirius nodded, “So we’re hopeful.” He said distractedly, tilting his head towards the door and trying to make out what was being said. 

“Bit of a surprise huh? Harry I mean…” Ron said after a moment. 

Sirius grunted in reply, “You’re telling me.” 

“Malfoy’s not so bad really.” Ron said, swigging the last of his water. “And he’s been good for Harry whilst you guys were gone.” He added. 

Sirius felt a wave of irritation at that, leaving for the month had not been his choice.“He’s a bully.” 

Ron’s mouth formed a tight line. “Maybe once. But looking back it was pretty two way, we gave as good as we got. And that’s all kid stuff really. Everyone’s been through so much since then. Harry’s been through so much.” 

Sirius scowled at that, wanting Ron to see that that was why he was concerned, “He’s -”

“Happy.” Ron interrupted, the hard tone of his voice sounding so different to usual and surprising Sirius momentarily, “and I don’t know about you but I have waited way too long to see that.” The redhead added quietly, dropping his glass into the sink as Harry reappeared in the doorway. “Okay?” Ron asked as he approached the man. “I’ll see you later.”

“If I’m alive.” Harry muttered and Sirius heard Ron snort in response as he squeezed his friend’s shoulder. 

“It’ll be fine.” Ron said quietly, his eyes meeting Sirius’ for a second before he left; the front door slamming a few seconds later. 

“Well Ron seems happy with it all.” Sirius muttered, not quite understanding why that was considering Ron had always made his dislike of Malfoy and the slytherin’s very clear. 

Harry shrugged, “He knows I’m happy.” He said quietly and Sirius bit at his lip to force back the prickling behind his eyes. 

“Who else knows?” He asked, wondering if he sounded as tired as he felt. 

Harry gave a half shrug, draining the last of his coffee. “‘Mione, Pansy and Blaise.” He said before a flush crept up his cheeks, “And Narcissa.”

“You told Narcissa?!” Sirius asked, trying not to feel hurt at the fact that Harry had trusted her over his own godfather. 

“Uh no… she uh.” Harry paused, scratching his head in that way James always used to when backed into a corner, “She walked in on us… in the dining room.” He admitted, scowling when Sirius failed to hold back his laughter. “I was going to tell you Sirius, but it was really new when you guys left and I didn't know how to word it over the floo…”

“I can understand that.” Sirius said, and he honestly did but that didn’t lessen the irritation he had been feeling since he had entered the flat. 

“And I really like him, more than I’ve ever liked anyone else.” Harry added. “He’s… He gets me, Sirius.” 

Sirius gave a small nod, drinking the last of his coffee and frowning at his godson over his mug, he could see how happy the boy was and Ron’s words rang in his ears, reminding him how long he’d been waiting to see Harry truly happy. “Dinner.” He decided, “Bring Malfoy, sometime this week.”

Harry blinked at him for a second, “Uh… Okay, thanks Sirius.” 

“But you have to tell Remus.” Sirius added and Harry nodded with no concern, “Including where you met up.” 

“Oh what?” Harry whined, no doubt knowing that Sirius’ reaction to him going out drinking whilst there were threats being made on his life would be nothing compared to Remus’. “I could say we met in diagon alley? Just shopping?”

Sirius laughed as he rose from the table and picked up Harry’s pot of floo powder, “You ever tried lying to Moony, kiddo?” He teased as he handed the pot back to Harry and threw a handful of the powder into the fire. “It’s pointless.”


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Reposting since I lost half of it the first time. 
> 
> Thanks so much for all your comments, kudos and bookmarks. It means a lot!

Remus was in the kitchen making tea when they flooed in and his face lit up when he saw them; “Harry! Oh I’ve missed you.” He said as he pulled him into a tight hug and Harry hugged him back, resting his head against Remus’ shoulder and taking a moment to just breathe.

“I’ve missed you too. How are you?” Harry asked, drawing back to look at Remus properly. He looked exhausted but no less than he had done before they had left for the medical trial in Rome, he’d also managed to put on some weight and now just looked underweight rather than malnourished which could only be a good sign.

“I’m fine!” Remus said, “Stop staring at me!” He added, cuffing Harry’s shoulder and making him laugh. “Cup of tea?” He offered and Harry nodded, sliding into one of the seats at the table. “I hope you didn’t have plans today? I told Sirius not to pester you…”

Harry winced slightly, his stomach churning and he looked up, his eyes meeting Sirius’; the man was leaning against the fridge, a half amused smile on his face and Harry decided that that was definitely much nicer to see than his anger earlier. “I uh… Just going for drinks with the boys.”

“Drinks?” Remus asked, turning now to look at Harry, his eyebrows furrowed. “Don’t have too many, you need to keep your wits about you.”

“Just with Ron, Blaise and… and Draco.” Harry continued and Remus’ expression switched from one of parental disapproval to one of surprise. “We umm… We’re kind of seeing each other, Draco and I.” Hardy added quietly, turning his gaze back to the table and playing with the small pepper pot. “I really like him.” He added, feeling childish as he said the words.

There was a silence for a moment and then a soft, “Oh.” Harry couldn’t bring himself to look up but then he heard a soft laugh, “Well that’s… nice. That’s good.” Remus said and when Harry did finally look at him the man was smiling and turning to Sirius, “Why are you not yelling? Did you already - Oh dear did you walk in on them?!”

“I’m traumatised.” Sirius said, throwing his arms up dramatically.

Harry rolled his eyes, feeling a wave of calm wash over him as Remus grinned back, “We were hardly in the throes of passion! Draco answered the door.” He told the man.

“In his underwear!”

Harry choked out a laugh, “They were mine actually.” He admitted and watched with amusement as Sirius’ jaw dropped in horror and Remus burst into laughter.

“And you’re okay with it?” Remus asked after a moment, looking at Sirius who gave a half shrug, avoiding his husband’s gaze. Harry stayed quiet, hoping they wouldn’t end up on another discussion about Draco’s past; he didn’t think he had the energy for another argument.

“I’m not overjoyed but the kid’s happy… I said he has to come to dinner, so we can get to know him properly. Make sure he’s changed.” Sirius’ voice was tense but he smiled and Harry felt a warm glow in his chest at the realisation of how much his godfather was trying; he hid a grin as Remus squeezed Sirius’ shoulder and murmured something in his ear making the man roll his eyes.

“So how long have you been dating then?” Remus asked as he stepped back from Sirius and carried on with making the tea. “And how did it end up happening? I didn’t think you’d spoken to him in a while.”

Harry swallowed, “Uh about a month.” He said quietly, hoping Remus would stay calm but knowing it was unlikely, the mild mannered man had a tendency to fly of the handle when it came to Harry’s safety; their screaming row a few years ago came to mind, Remus’ rage filled face when he’d stormed out of Grimmauld place after Harry had refused to let him join them on the horcrux hunt was not something Harry would forget in a hurry. “We met in a bar in diagon alley.” He said carefully, wincing as Remus stopped stirring the tea, “Hermione stopped someone from being shitty to him and his friends and then we just got talking and… it went from there.”

“Were you drunk?” His voice was calm and measured but Harry saw Sirius winced sympathetically and he sighed.

“Barely.” He lied and Remus turned finally to look at him, raising an eyebrow but not speaking which, to be honest, felt worse than if he was yelling. “Okay maybe a bit but I was fine! There were loads of people around!” Even as he spoke he knew that his words were wrong.

“And you knew all those people? That they were safe to be around?” Remus asked. “That none of them were going to curse you?”

Harry scowled, Remus really needed to stop treating him like a child. “I had my friends with me! Come on Remus, You’re being insane.”

“Harry!” There was a warning tone to Sirius’ voice and he felt a flash of anger, why was Sirius telling him off when Remus was the one being unreasonable

“Harry anything could have happened to you. You agreed with the aurors to keep a low profile until they found out who was threatening you.”

Harry took another deep breath, willing himself to stay calm and pushing down the burning anger he could feel creeping up on him, “I was hardly dancing on tables.” He said through gritted teeth, remembering a moment later that that wasn't technically true, “Besides I can’t hide away forever. I just want to have some fun Rem!”

“I cannot believe you are risking your safety. After everything we have done to keep you alive!” Remus said angrily and Harry felt himself snap; the anger he had bottled up pouring out now.

“Right, keeping me alive.” He spat out, “Except Voldemort’s gone now Remus, so you don’t have to worry about keeping me alive to defeat him anymore!” He ignored Sirius’ strangled call of his name, pushing past the man and almost running out of the house and up the street before they could stop him.

.-***-.

Harry was still shaking with anger when he arrived at the small muggle pub in Peckham that he had been supposed to meet Zabini in that afternoon. It was now seven o’clock, about two hours later than his original plan, and so the pub was packed and noisy as Harry shoved his way past sweaty bodies in an attempt to find the men. He spotted them in a corner booth, laughing at something and couldn’t help but smile; it still felt weird to see Ron with the Slytherins, and he knew that it must be even stranger for Ron to see him with Draco, which made him all the more grateful for how accepting Ron had been of the whole thing. When Harry had admitted to Ron and Hermione what was going on - nine days, four dates and a hell of a lot of sex into the relationship - Ron had only taken twenty minutes and quarter of a bottle of firewhiskey to nod and declare that “that sixth year obsession makes so much sense now”, a point Harry had ignored.

“Harry!” Ron called out as he spotted him and Harry gave a weak smile, walking over and sliding into the booth beside Draco. “That bad huh?” Ron asked as Harry stole his glass and drained the last of the beer.

Harry grunted in reply, trying to figure out his words and he saw Zabini roll his eyes and get up, pushing past people to get to the bar. He felt more tension settle in his shoulders, knowing that Zabini thought he was an arse as it was and he probably wasn’t helping; it had taken a lot for the man to agree to invite Harry along to his and Draco’s drinking session, though he’d been happy enough to invite Ron; a fact which Draco had found hilarious and Harry had tried not to be hurt by. “I think they’re coming round to the idea.” He said finally, answering Ron’s question.

“So why do you look like someone murdered your -” Draco cut himself off suddenly and Harry wondered what he had been planning on saying; house elf would be the usual saying and Harry felt a tightening in his chest that eased slightly as he realised that Draco had stopped his sentence to protect Harry. “Fish.” Draco settled on after a moment and Ron snorted.

“Lupin.” Harry grumbled, “He just went off on one about how I shouldn’t have been out drinking and it wasn’t safe.”

“Maybe he has a point.” Draco muttered, holding his hands up in mock surrender as Harry scowled at him, “If someone’s threatening you…”

Harry sighed, “I can’t hide away in my flat forever.” He muttered as Zabini reappeared, putting a glass in front of Harry and he raised it to his lips without paying it any attention, surprised to taste whisky instead of his usual beer.

He looked up, finding Zabini leaning back in his chair regarding him cooly. “About the only decent thing the muggles sell.” He said with a shrug, completely blanking Harry’s filthy look.

“No-one’s saying you have to hide.” Draco said in response to Harry’s comment, choosing to ignore Zabini’s. “Just be careful, and stay sober enough to protect yourself.” He added, looking for all the world like the self righteous little prince he had been at school.

“I wasn't that drunk!” Harry said automatically, folding his arms across his chest defensively.

Draco twisted his lips, looking like he disagreed, “You wanked off your childhood enemy in the bathroom of a club.” He pointed out and Harry scowled at him, ignoring Ron and Zabini’s twin sounds of disgusts.

“That is so unhygienic.” Zabini said as Ron grumbled something about too much information.

Draco didn't seem to notice Harry’s scowl, instead he just raised an eyebrow, his eyes never leaving Harry’s and Harry let out a slow breath, feeling some of the tension leave his body; “Maybe don’t mention that at dinner.” He muttered as he dropped his head onto the table.

“Dinner?” Draco repeated and when Harry turned his head to the side to look at the man there was a small smile gracing his lips.

-.*.*.-

Harry’s head ached when he woke the next morning and he cursed Zabini and his stupid whisky. After the muggle pub they had gone back to the man’s flat where they had managed to get through a large bottle of his firewhiskey before he had finally kicked them out at around one in the morning when Harry and Draco got a little too handsy for his liking. Harry pulled himself upwards, finding a hangover potion and a glass of water on his bedside table and he smiled, realising that his boyfriend must have left them there before going to work; god bless Draco Malfoy.

When Harry finally dragged himself downstairs half an hour later he found two scrolls on the kitchen table near a bowl of water and silently thanked Draco again for dealing with the owls rather than waking Harry up, he cast a quick spell on the scrolls, checking for any curses, before opening the first one when it glowed blue to show it was safe. An apology letter from Remus, short and to the point, he had overreacted and he was sorry, Harry was so wrong about what he had said and could he please come over to talk about it, Remus didn't want Harry to ever think anything like that. Harry felt a flush of shame as he remembered what he had said, deep down he knew it wasn’t true but… there was always this little niggling voice in the back of his head saying otherwise, ever since he had heard the man’s words to Kingsley whilst they were moving him from Privet Drive.

_Harry is the best hope we have._

He knew they were Dumbledore’s words really; and he had long made peace with the fact that the man had been training him to fulfill his one purpose of defeating Voldemort; but why would Remus and Kingsley use them as their code if they hadn’t agreed with them? Harry let out a huff of air, knowing that in the end it didn’t really matter, he was going to go and see Remus and apologise either way, because even if Remus had been primarily focused on the war back then he knew it was Harry’s safety he was concerned about now. He pulled open the second scroll absentmindedly as he moved to make himself some coffee; it took him a moment to fully register the words scrawled on it.

**_You should have died._ **

Harry swallowed; all thoughts of Remus now gone as he stared at the parchment, slowly scrunching it up into a ball as though hiding the words could destroy them. He should take it to the aurors, he knew that, but at the same time he couldn’t really see the point. So far they had absolutely no information on who was sending the letters; Tonks was leading the investigation, her first since returning to work, and she had admitted to Harry only a few days ago that they had no leads at all; truth was there were way too many ex death eaters out there who hated him enough to try and curse him. He glanced back down at the ball of parchment, his chest tightening painfully as he thought of the words and he shoved the paper into his jeans pocket. There was no point in handing it in anyway, it wasn’t exactly a threat, more of a passing comment. And it was the truth after all.

.-*-*-.

Despite Remus’ letter that morning Harry was still unsure of his welcome and so rather than flooing in like he usually would he found himself apparating to the small alley near their house and walking. After he had woken from his five month coma to find that he had been pardoned Sirius had refused to return to Grimmauld Place; instead he and Remus had purchased this large cottage on the outskirts of a small wizarding village near to where Remus had grown up. It was close to both the mountains and the beach and had satisfied Sirius’ need for open space and fresh air; he had been devastated when they had had to leave during the war. “Harry!” Sirius’ expression was one of surprise as he opened the door and then his mouth drooped slightly, “You don’t have to knock.” He said quietly, “You can use the floo.”

Harry hated how tired Sirius looked and he sighed, not knowing how to explain, “No I…” He trailed off, shrugging awkwardly, “Remus in?”

His godfather smiled then, “Yeah, yeah come through.” He said quickly, as though worried Harry would change his mind. “He’s making lunch.” He added as Harry stepped into the hallway, closing the door behind himself. Harry turned back to follow his godfather to the kitchen and was surprised to find himself pulled into a tight hug, “I bloody love you kid, don’t ever think otherwise.” Sirius said gruffly into his hair, pulling back and moving down the hallway before Harry could respond. The tightening in his chest worsened as he followed the man to the kitchen, suddenly acutely aware of just how much his words must have hurt not only Remus, the letter from that morning flashed into his mind and he shivered. “Rem, look who’s here.”

Remus turned from where he had been cutting salad, a brief smile crossing his face as he saw Harry, “Harry!”

Harry smiled weakly in response, fighting against the tightness in his chest, “I got your letter.” He said as he let out a deep breath, trying to remember what Hermione had said about focusing on his breathing, “I’m sorry.” He added quietly, dropping his gaze to the floor when Remus didn’t reply.

“No! I… You don’t have to apologise.” Remus said quickly and when Harry looked back up at him the man was watching him with concern. Harry tried to smile again but it didn’t seem to help and Remus moved towards him placing a hand on his shoulder and pushing him into a chair at the table, “Harry.” His voice was soft, “It’s okay.”

Harry gave a half shrug, “I didn’t mean it.” He mumbled. “Fuck. I’m sorry Remus.”

“I’m gonna uh.” Sirius cleared his throat, gesturing his thumb towards the door, “go pee.” He said and left, closing the door behind carefully himself, leaving them alone.

Harry opened his mouth to speak, closing it again as he realised he didn’t know what to say, he watched as Remus sat down beside him, “I didn’t mean to upset anyone.” Harry said finally; hating how pathetic he sounded; how useless his words were.

“I’m only upset because you are.” Remus said softly and Harry felt something untwist in his gut, “I know I haven’t been a very good guardian to you, or even a friend to be honest. But it was never about defeating Voldemort over keeping you safe. Never.” He continued when Harry tried to interrupt, to say that Remus had been great. “I don’t know what I did to make you think -”

“You and Kingsley.” Harry muttered, “The last words Dumbledore said to you both.”

Remus’ eyebrows knotted together in confusion for a moment before his eyes widened in realisation, “Oh Harry.” He leant forward, taking Harry’s hand, “We chose that just because we were the only two in the room at the time; no-one could have overheard it. That was the only reason.” Harry gave a small nod, believing the man and feeling ashamed for thinking otherwise, “Dumbledore was a great man but… he was very misguided when it came to you.” Remus said.

“He did what he had to.” Harry shrugged and saw a flash of pain cross Remus’ face.

“Your safety comes first to Sirius and I… and I know I’m a little over the top sometimes.” Remus said, “I just, I feel like I let you down. Seeing you there in Hagrid's arms…” His voice broke and Harry shivered, “I never want to have to go through that again.” Harry moved off his seat to hug the man, “You and Sirius. You’re all I have.” Remus finished, hugging Harry back tightly.

Harry and Sirius were always hugging and play fighting but Remus was a lot less tactile and so they didn’t hug often, not like this anyway, yesterday had probably been the first time since Harry was cursed, and it felt nice; like coming home. “I’ll be more careful, I promise.” Harry said quietly, knowing it was what Remus needed to hear.


	3. Chapter 3

Sirius smiled as he handed his godson a mug of tea before placing his own on a coaster and sitting back down beside Remus; he didn't know the exact details of their conversation earlier and he didn’t really care, he was just happy they had made up. “Do you have the whole week off?” He asked Harry who nodded and said that they were being paired with the trained aurors now so they could choose their own time off, he’d booked this week since he knew Remus was coming home. “How are you finding the training?” 

“Yeah it’s good…” Harry said vaguely, giving a half shrug when Sirius looked at him questioningly and the man sighed. Harry had taken a dislike to auror training within a few weeks of starting it but he was still determined to carry on and qualify like his dad did, despite multiple reassurances from both Remus and Sirius that James would just want him to be happy. 

“What does Draco do?” Remus asked, managing to sound genuinely curious rather than accusatory like Sirius knew he would have done.

“He’s just started training at the apothecary for his potions mastery; he wants to work in the labs in St Mungo’s eventually.” Harry said; his face seemed to light up as he spoke and Sirius had a sudden image of James talking animatedly about Lily flash through his mind. 

He wondered how James would react to Harry dating Malfoy and found a flicker of comfort in the knowledge that he would likely have responded in the same way as Sirius and made absolutely certain that his intentions were good; though knowing James he would have managed to go about it in a much more subtle way and not upset Harry like Sirius had. He felt the usual tug of grief and took a moment to just close his eyes and breathe, he wondered if it was normal for it still to hurt so much, all these years later. 

When he opened his eyes he could see Harry watching him in concern and he cleared his throat quickly, “I suppose Malfoy’s good at potions? With Snape such a good family friend.” He said, unable to help himself. 

Harry’s face clouded over and Sirius could feel Remus’ nail digging into his thigh, telling him to stop talking right now. “His name’s Draco. And yes I suppose Snape did teach him some stuff.” Harry muttered, scowling back down at his cup of tea. “But Draco likes potions for more than that, and he’s good at it because he tries hard.” 

“He always was a good student.” Remus chipped in, removing his hand from Sirius’ leg and picking up his own mug of tea, “Put in more effort than some.” He added with a small grin and Sirius watched as Harry pulled a mock annoyed face. 

“Hopefully as much effort as he put into dressing up as a dementor and trying to scare the shit out of you.” Sirius muttered, shuffling up the sofa as Remus put down his mug again and sent him a disapproving look.

Harry scowled but didn’t respond and Remus let out an audible sigh, “Which you and James would have found hilarious when we were in school.” He said quietly and Sirius sucked in a sharp breath because the man was right, and he knew that. 

“A lot of people are idiots when they’re fifteen. That’s what you said. And how is Draco any different?” Harry asked angrily, “How is some of the stupid shit he did any different to what you and my dad did to Snape?” Sirius swallowed, an uncomfortable sensation settling in. “And my dad changed. So why can’t Draco.” Harry added quietly, the fact that he felt like Sirius hadn’t was left unsaid and Sirius found himself wondering if the boy was right; he knew he’d been a bit of a dick in school but that was just pranking right? 

Maybe they had, on occasion, taken it a little far but… Well Snape had definitely deserved it; whereas Harry hadn’t deserved anything Malfoy had done. His chest hurt suddenly and he let out a grunt in response to his godson’s words; ignoring the look that passed between Harry and Remus. 

Harry huffed and stood up, “I have to pee.” He said before leaving the room and stomping up the stairs as loudly as possible. 

They were quiet for a moment before Remus sighed loudly, “You’re being ridiculous.” 

“Says the man who alienated Harry the second we got back.” Sirius spat out the words without even considering their impact, a wave of self hatred washing over him as Remus’ face clouded over. 

The man swallowed, “Harry’s right.” He said quietly, his voice hard, “James did change.” 

“Fuck you.” Sirius muttered automatically, though he could hear his voice breaking as he said it. Harry was right and he knew it deep down, Sirius had been a bully at school; cruel to other kids just to make people laugh, to feel better about how shit he had felt. And maybe Remus was right that he hadn’t changed, here he was still making shitty comments and winding other people up, he couldn’t help himself, part of being born a Black he supposed before his heart sank again because he wanted to be nothing like them.

“Look you promised him you’d try yeah?” Remus said quietly and when Sirius looked up the irritation was gone from the man’s face, replaced with only exhaustion and Sirius hated himself for that, Remus deserved better. “Just keep your comments on Malfoy until Harry’s gone home?” The man suggested and Sirius nodded silently as he heard Harry come back down the stairs. 

Harry looked between them for a moment before shrugging his shoulders and smiling uncomfortably “Got any biscuits? I’m starved.” 

“You just had lunch!” Remus laughed, glancing over at Sirius again who forced himself to smile. 

“He’s a growing boy Moons, gotta keep him well fed!” 

.-*-*-*-.

By thursday evening Sirius had managed to persuade himself once again that Harry being happy was all that mattered; and as Remus had pointed out, they could always hex Malfoy later if he turned out to still be a jerk. He felt strangely nervous about this dinner, a need to make a good impression sneaking in alongside his concern for Harry; Remus had kicked him out of the kitchen a while ago and so Sirius was sat in the garden, cursing himself for giving up smoking, when he heard the floo go off. He rolled his shoulders back and stood up, reminding himself to stay calm and be nice; they were stood by the fireplace talking to Remus when he opened the back door and Harry gave him a hopeful smile. “Alright?” He asked. 

“Hello Mr Black.” Draco said quietly, looking surprisingly timid; then again the last time they had met Sirius had been holding a wand to his chest so he couldn't really blame him. 

Harry laughed, “You can call him Sirius.”

“Mr Black is fine.” Sirius said, ignoring Harry’s eye roll and instead motioning Draco towards the table; the man slid into a chair and gave a weak smile as Harry sat beside him, squeezed his knee gently and poured him a glass of wine. “Busy day?” Sirius asked, trying to remember how to make small talk. 

“Umm yes, it was rather.” Draco said, accepting the plate of chicken Remus put before him with a murmured thanks and nodding when the man told him to help himself to the vegetables on the table. 

Sirius nodded his thanks as he was given his own plate, “I suppose it’s that time of year.” He said and Draco smiled and replied something about schoolchildren and without Sirius even paying attention the conversation had moved on to Hogwarts supplies and then quickly on to Quidditch and the latest brooms. 

“Harry dragged us to a match when we were in Rome.” Remus was telling Draco, “For his birthday present, it was surprisingly good actually. And I’ve never been a big fan.” Sirius smiled at the memory, the one time Harry had been able to come out and visit them during the potions trial had, thankfully, coincided with the few days when Remus had felt his best and been able to go out and do things. 

“It was Bulgaria v Italy so Viktor invited us to meet the players.” Harry teased Draco who pouted, “You’d have loved it.” 

Sirius chipped in to the conversation occasionally but mostly he just watched the two men; the way Harry deliberately brushed their hands together as he reached for his wine glass and the way Draco was leaning ever so slightly to his left and closer to Harry reminded Sirius, once again, of how James and Lily had been together. They bounced off each other, Sirius thought, gentle teasing thrown in with small smiles and casual glances that seemed to be checking they weren’t going too far; when the topic moved to school quidditch matches Harry steered it back to international sport, a small crease above his eyebrow. 

Sirius found himself wondering if the two ever discussed school, and their mutual dislike of each other, surely it wasn't a topic they could avoid but apart from a couple of jokes about McGonagall being a slave driver and Filch being the bane of their life the topic of Hogwarts wasn’t mentioned all evening. Probably deliberate to stop Sirius bringing up any past bullying he supposed and then felt bad. 

Harry caught his eye as Remus rose and began to clear up the plates and get dessert ready, waving off Draco’s offer of help, “I’m just going to the loo.” Harry said quietly, raising an eyebrow at his godfather that was clearly telling him to behave. 

Sirius nodded, giving him a small smile in a silent promise to be nice; Harry smiled back, resting his hand on Draco’s on top of the table and squeezing it gently before leaving the room. The kitchen was silent for a moment and Sirius rested back in his chair, listening to Remus moving around behind him, “I… I know you’re not happy about Harry and I.” Draco said suddenly, his eyes fixed on Sirius. “Understandably given my history, but I truly do care for him a lot.”

“We don’t doubt that.” Remus said quietly, placing a bowl of apple crumble in front of the man; Draco glanced up at him before turning back to Sirius, clearly waiting for his response. 

Sirius sucked in his teeth and frowned at the man in front of him; there was a lot he could say, should say, about how Draco reminded him of Regulus and of himself, that he knew what it was to come from a family like that and that it never truly left you, no matter how hard you tried. 

That he himself had been an arse and a bully in school and he knew deep down he still was at times so why would Draco be any different? And mostly he wanted to tell him that Harry deserved better, just like Remus did, but instead Sirius gave a small nod, watching Draco carefully, “I just want Harry to be happy, and for some reason he’s decided that you’re the person so who can do that so…” He said, “I don’t even have to explain how painful it’ll be for you if you fuck that up.” 

Draco shook his head quickly, “No sir.” He said. 

Remus barked out a laugh at that, putting more bowls down on the table, “You know I taught this boy for ten months and I don’t think I ever heard him call me sir.” He said, his voice teasing, “Mind you respecting teachers wasn’t something we were exceptional at either.” He added as Draco flushed a deep red and mumbled an apology. 

Harry came bounding down the stairs then, taking them two at a time by the sounds of it, and flopped down into his chair, grinning first at Draco and then at the food in front of him. “This smells amazing Moony!”

“Why does it always sound like there’s four of you coming down the stairs?” Sirius asked as Remus sat back down beside him.

Harry rolled his eyes, “You sound like Mrs Weasley.” He said and Sirius wondered if he ought to be insulted by that as Remus burst out laughing.

.-*-*-*-.

“So?” Harry asked as soon as Draco had flooed away. 

“He seems… nice.” Sirius said.

“He is! Well sometimes he can be a bit of a stuck up dick, but mostly he’s nice.” Harry said, frowning at Sirius. “But you like him right? I mean you’re not still mad about us being together?” 

Sirius sighed, “I’m not mad.” He said, “I’m just concerned. But he does seem like a decent kid and merlin knows we all deserve a second chance.” It had been the way they were together that had sold it to him way more than Draco’s good manners really, those had clearly been put on just as much as his had when he was meeting the Lupins all those years ago, but the affection on the boy’s face when talking to Harry… Well that had eased some of Sirius’ discomfort. 

Harry grinned at his godfather's words, “Thanks Sirius.” 

“Are you staying for a bit?” Remus asked him as Harry gathered the empty tea mugs off the table and put them in the sink.

“Nah, I should go. Draco’ll be pacing his flat wondering how I think it went.” Harry laughed, “See you at the Weasley’s on saturday?” 

“We’ll be there.” Sirius promised, pulling Harry into a hug before he could escape through the floo. “I’m glad you’re happy.” He murmured as they parted and Harry smiled softly before saying his goodbyes and flooing away. 

Sirius turned from the fireplace to find Remus watching him, a fond smile on the man’s face, “I love you.” 

“Love you too you daft sod.” Sirius said, ducking as a tea towel came flying towards his face. “You know you can use magic to wash up right Moon?” 

Remus chuckled, “I did the cooking so I’m pretty sure it’s your turn anyway.” Sirius made a show of pouting but he moved over to the pile of dishes, casting a cleaning charm on each one seperately, knowing that something always got missed if he did them all together. His mind zoned out on the task, returning to Harry and Draco and how happy Harry seemed with the other boy; the besotted expression on his face a mirror image of his father’s whenever Lily was around. “You okay?” Remus asked quietly after a moment. 

Sirius hummed, not sure how to put what he was feeling into words, “I just wish James were here.” He said finally, his voice catching in his throat and making him cough. 

“He’d be right up there with you in the overprotective parenting.” Remus joked, “But he’d be so proud… Of you both.” Sirius put the last mug into the draining rack; he wondered if Remus’ words were true before deciding he didn’t want to question them, he just wanted to believe them and he gave a weak smile, moving to hug his husband and smiling as he felt the man’s lips against his head. “Love you so much.” 

“I love you too Moony. Forever and always.” Sirius whispered. 

“Forever and always.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry if the formatting is a little off; I'm struggling using just mobile and my laptop's completely gone now.
> 
> Thank you so much to everyone who has bookmarked, commented and left kudos on this.


	4. Chapter 4

Harry lay in bed for about thirty minutes trying to avoid having to get up before he had the sudden realisation that he had agreed to meet Hermione and Nev in Diagon Alley for lunch and he was running out of time to get ready. He’d flooed back to his at about eight, as Draco got ready for work, all full of intentions to do something productive with his morning, but had ended up crawling back into bed and waking up five hours later, leaving him in the panic he was in now. As he leapt out of bed he stubbed his toe on the bedside table and swore loudly, hopping across the room to his chest of drawers. 

A quick cleanliness charm and a fresh pair of boxers later and Harry was quickly coming to the conclusion that he really needed to do some laundry; the pile of clothes in the corner of the room needing a good wash was far outweighing the limited amount left in his drawers. Knowing he was out of time he dragged on a pair of jeans from the bedroom floor, casting a quick freshening charm on them first, lest Hermione complain, and pulled on the new tee-shirt Remus had bought him from Rome. It would have to do he decided, looking in the mirror and flattening his hair down as best he could. 

His wallet, mini floo powder pot, and flat keys were, thankfully, on the coffee table in the living room and he grabbed them, glancing at the old muggle clock on the wall and pulling a face as he realised he was already late. Harry got himself a glass of water and gulped it down, casting a cleaning charm on his teeth and moving towards the fireplace wondering how annoyed Hermione was going to be.

She was already raising an eyebrow at him as he stepped out of the floo in the leaky cauldron and walked towards the small table they were sat at, trying to look apologetic as he did so. “You’re late.” She said. 

“Only like fifteen minutes.” Harry replied, giving her a hug, “Alright Nev?” He asked his friend. 

“Yeah, you?” 

“Not bad.” Harry said, “Have you ordered?” 

Hermione nodded, “I got your usual. But only just so there’s probably time to change it if…” She trailed off as Harry shook his head to tell her it was fine. “Why were you late?”

“Merlin Hermione, let the boy breathe.” Neville laughed, “Do you want a pint?” He offered and Harry nodded, thanking the man as he stood up and went over to the bar. 

“So?” Hermione said, “Did everything go okay last night.” 

Harry held back a laugh at how impatient his friend was and nodded in response to her question, “Yeah, surprisingly okay actually. Everyone behaved.” He said, looking around to make sure that nobody was listening, “I think Sirius might actually be coming around, for real this time.” 

Hermione smiled tightly, “That’s good.” She said, though she didn’t sound convinced and Harry resisted rolling his eyes. Hermione had responded pretty much exactly as he had expected; a quiet acceptance of his relationship with Draco alongside an unspoken uneasiness that Harry was sure was going to bubble to the surface eventually. 

Hermione changed the subject to the new school year as Neville walked back over and Harry felt a flush of guilt for keeping his friend in the dark; he really needed to talk to Draco about telling more people now that Sirius and Remus knew. “The whole alley is just full of students; manic.”

“That’s what happens the week before September first.” Harry pointed out, taking a swig of his beer and rolling his eyes at Neville who stifled a laugh, “Besides, S’good practice for our Nev here.” 

“‘M sick of kids already.” Neville muttered and Harry and Hermione laughed, “Seriously though, It’s weird to be going back. Exciting though.” 

“You’re going to be an amazing teacher.” Hermione told him. 

“Teaching assistant.” Neville corrected.

Hermione rolled her eyes, “Only for the year. Then you’ll be really teaching. I’m so happy for you!”

Harry nodded his agreement, “It’s good to be doing what you want.” He said, thinking of auror training and feeling the usual dread settle in his stomach at the thought of returning to work on Monday. “And you’ll be great at it.” He added, ignoring Hermione’s knowing look and thanking Tom as the man placed their food on the table in front of them. 

“Well I learnt from the best teacher.” Neville grinned once Tom had left and Harry smiled, knowing how close he was to Professor Sprout, then Neville added; “All those months in the DA…” and Harry blinked at him.

“I was just making it up as I went,” He pointed out, “You’ll know what you’re doing. Let’s hope they look up to you anyway, and that the older ones don’t remember that time you tried to grow your hair out!” He laughed, ducking as Neville threw a beer mat at him. 

Neville leant back in his chair then, taking a swig of his pint, “It will be weird with the older ones mind; bumped into Dennis Creevey and Samuel Harston earlier, they’re going into seventh year. They’ll remember me as a kid so merlin knows how I’ll get them to listen to me.” 

Hermione sighed “They looked up to you when you were in school so it’ll be no different.” She pointed out and Neville gave a half shrug, his cheeks colouring slightly. 

“How is Dennis?” Harry asked, trying to sound casual. The last time he had seen the boy it had been at Colin’s funeral and Dennis had barely looked at him; Harry had always meant to stay in contact but somehow it had never happened; he’d never quite known what to say, or how to say what he really wanted to. 

Neville shrugged, telling Harry that Dennis had seemed okay, “He said to say hi to you, when I said we were meeting for lunch.” Neville added around a bite of sandwich and Harry smiled, feeling a little less guilty for not having spoken to the boy. 

They ate in silence for a while, enjoying the food, before Neville asked after Ron and Hermione launched into a complaint about his auror hours and how she seemed to barely see him now. Harry sighed and reminded her that it was only for another six months and then Ron would have more control over his shifts and be able to work them around Hermione’s law mastery hours. “I know, it’s just frustrating that we’ve got less time together since moving in.” She said.

“To be fair you’d only argue if you were together all the time.” Neville pointed out with a wicked grin and Harry laughed loudly as Hermione gave him a filthy look, “So what’s the plan this afternoon?” Neville asked quickly, clearly looking to change the subject.

“I need to go to Flourish and Blotts.” Harry said, humouring his friend and getting Hermione’s attention at the name of the book shop, “Remus recommended a couple of books and there’s one I have to get for work.” He pulled a face and Neville frowned slightly.

“How’s it going?” He asked, pushing his plate away. 

Harry shrugged, a sudden urge to open up and admit how little he enjoyed it going through him but knowing that anyone could be listening and it would be front page of the prophet by the morning, which would hardly go down well with his supervisor. “Yeah, it’s good. Interesting.” He said, “Did you still need Gringotts?” Neville nodded in reply, joking that Harry and Hermione had better stay outside in case they damaged anything and Harry rolled his eyes, though secretly thought that his friend may be right, the goblins were still giving them dirty looks two years later. 

Tom appeared within seconds of Hermione piling her plate on to Neville’s and they waved off the offer of dessert, thanking the man as they paid their bills; Harry knowing well enough not to bother offering to cover the other two’s by now. 

Laughing and joking they made their way down the street and to flourish and blotts, Harry doing his best to ignore the looks and whispers he was getting, “Which book did Remus suggest?” Hermione asked quietly, drawing his attention and successfully distracting him. 

“Crime thriller, He read a review in the prophet and it’s supposed to be good. Said it was more my kind of thing than his though. Some kid gets abducted in scotland and the aurors have like ten hours to get him back before he dies or something,” 

“Wonderful.” Hermione said, her lip curling and Harry laughed. He had always loved crime books, both muggle and wizarding, which was a bit of a joke really considering how much he disliked the job in real life. 

Harry managed to find the books he wanted within about ten minutes and then spent a further half hour browsing and chatting with Neville, waiting for Hermione to finish whatever it was she was doing. Eventually he got too bored and suggested to Neville that they head to Gringotts and meet Hermione at the new ice cream shop in ten minutes, “Otherwise she’ll be here forever.” He joked, wondering how long Hermione would genuinely be able to spend in the shop if she wasn't given a time limit; she somehow manage to look panicked when told she only had ten minutes and Harry tried not to laugh at the pile of books already in her hands. 

He wandered over to the cashier, paying for his books and walking away whilst trying to push them into his bag, not wanting to hold up the queue. He had just failed miserably at opening his bag and was mumbling a thank you to Neville for holding the door open when he spotted Dennis Creevey leaning against the shop wall beside him. Despite what Neville had said earlier Harry’s stomach still churned violently at the thought of speaking to the boy, the regret of not doing so sooner and the panic of not knowing what to say hitting him at once. There was no way of avoiding it though as Dennis turned and spotted them, smiling politely and pushing himself off the wall, walking towards him, followed by another boy around his age who Harry vaguely recognised. “You stalking us Neville?” Dennis teased, “Alright Harry?” He added and Harry forced a smile on to his face. 

“Dennis! How are you? How’s the family?” 

“They’re fine.” Dennis said quietly, there was a hard look on his face for a second and Harry took a deep breathe, trying to figure out what to say, he was wondering if he should apologise for Colin’s death when Dennis smiled suddenly. “Excited to be nearly done with school.” He said randomly, “I’m gonna try for auror training.” 

“That’s great!” Harry said, “It’s really… fun. You’ll have to survive a year with Nev first though!” He joked and Dennis laughed. “I’m glad you’re doing well.” Harry added quietly, “I was looking out for you at the memorial -”

“I had school.” Dennis said shortly, “My parents need me to do well.” The fact that he was the only child they had left who could was left unsaid and Harry felt a tightening in his chest at the thought, an image of Colin sat in the gryffindor common room revising for his OWL’s flashing through his mind. 

“Shame about that with me teaching.” Neville said, lightening the air a little and they all laughed, Dennis and his friend reassuring Neville that they were looking forward to his classes. “Right, we should get the the bank.” Neville added, his eyes never leaving Harry who nodded, forcing himself to focus. 

“It was good to see you.” Harry told Dennis who gave him a tight smile. Just as they were turning to leave someone came rushing past, shoving into Harry and sending him tripping forward, almost bashing into Dennis as he did so, “Watch where you’re going!” Harry said, turning to scowl at the person who was already halfway down the street, their cloak billowing behind them. “You alright?” He asked Dennis who nodded and handed him the books he’d dropped, “Thanks.” Harry said, shoving them into his bag and quickly side stepping as one of the shop assistant came rushing out of the shop and raced up the street after the cloaked figure. 

“All excitement down here today.” Neville said with a grin and Harry laughed, “See you next week!” Neville added, waving to Dennis and his friend who smiled and left, deep in conversation, presumably about what had just happened. 

“You okay?” Hermione asked, appearing from behind Harry, “What was all that about?” 

“Some shoplifter I think.” Harry gave a shrug, “All done?” 

Hermione nodded, smiling guiltily, “Just don’t tell Ron how much I bought!” She said and Harry laughed, looping his arm through hers and nodding down the street towards Gringotts. 

.-*-*-*-.

It was late evening by the time Harry made it home, his stomach painfully full of ice cream, and his first instinct was to flop down onto his sofa and stay there until he could be bothered to move again. He was just about to do so when he wondered if Draco would pop by, the man had mentioned it in passing the night before but he hadn’t sounded very certain and so Harry didn’t really know what the plan was anymore. He should probably clear up just in case, he thought, casting a cleaning charm on the spilt floo powder on the floor by the fireplace. Harry moved into the kitchen and had a quick tidy up before moving back into the sitting room; he tipped the bag out onto his sofa, tidying the books away onto the shelf and putting the new photo frame Hermione had bought him onto the side table, ready to fill it. 

There was a pile of coins, receipts and a quill he didn’t even remember buying, left on his sofa cushion and he picked the coins up, chucking then into the small bowl on the coffee table that Draco had bought him after knocking over one too many piles of coins Harry had left dotted around; then he grabbed the papers and quill - 

The pain was instant and burning, spreading through his body and causing him to drop to the floor with the intensity of it as he called out, opening his palm automatically to drop whatever it was that had caused it. He barely registered that it hadn't worked, the pain consuming him and stopping any rational thought as he writhed on the floor, his mouth letting out a constant scream.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for all the comments and kudos!


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Very brief mentions of self harm and suicide attempt.

  
“If I cursed him why would I bring him to the hospital?!” Sirius followed the sound of Malfoy’s voice, pushing past the man and the aurors he was yelling at, letting Remus deal with them; his focus was entirely on the room behind them and his godson.

Harry lay in the hospital bed, his eyes closed and it took a heart stopping second for Sirius to register that the man’s chest was moving. “Oh thank god.” He hadn’t even realised he had spoken until a healer appeared at his side.

“Mr Black? Harry is going to be fine, we sedated him because of the amount of pain he was experiencing.” The man said and Sirius turned to him; merlin he didn't look much older than Harry was, “But we have the pain under control now, and he should start to wake soon.”

“Tha - Thanks.” Sirius said, his voice catching, “I… What happened?” He asked as he moved closer to the bed, he went to take Harry’s right hand only to find it bandaged.

An older healer, who Sirius recognised from last time they had been in, turned from where she had been scribbling in some notes, “Sirius, hello. The curse was the same as last time but stronger, the aurors seem to think that that’s only due to the object having not been infused with it for as long so less of it had worn off. We’ll be more sure once they’ve run some analysis.”

Sirius nodded, swallowing back the bile in his throat, “The cruciatus again?” He confirmed quietly.

The small nod of her head said it all, “The cursed quill was also charmed to stick to Harry’s hand. It’s burnt the flesh where we had to remove it but that should be healed within the next hour.”

Sirius felt a wave of nausea go through him and he grabbed Harry’s other hand, squeezing it tightly, “Will it have affected him? The cruciatus?” He asked, thinking if Frank and Alice and biting back a cry at the thought of Harry ending up like that.

“There’s no reason to think so.” The woman said quietly, “He was semi lucid when he came in; managing to speak through the pain.”

Sirius nodded, forcing himself to focus on the here and now and not on the what if’s; the younger healer pulled a chair over to the bed, motioning for Sirius to sit, and he thanked the man, dragging it as close to Harry as he could and taking his hand again. “I’m here pup, and I won’t let anything else happen to you.” Sirius murmured, feeling his throat tighten further as he remembered saying the exact same words last time, “You’re safe now.” He added quietly, his voice breaking as he did so. It was another ten minutes before Remus and Draco entered the room.

“Why isn’t he awake? He was awake when we got here!” Draco said loudly as soon as he walked in, looking around for the healers, the youngest of whom walked over and explained about the sedation. Draco nodded silently in response, his eyes focused on Harry as he moved closer to the bed.

“What happened?”

The man looked up then and Sirius noticed just how broken he looked, “I uh… I flooed in and he was just on the floor screaming.” Malfoy said, his voice low, “I tried to get it off him but it was stuck, so I flooed the hospital.” His hand twitched towards Harry, and Sirius saw thin dressings on all his fingers.

“It hurt you too?” Sirius asked, feeling Remus behind him now, the man’s hand coming to rest on his back.

Draco gave a shrug, “The feathers stuck but they came off in my hand.” He muttered, not sounding concerned, “I don’t understand how… Harry checks all his mail.”

“That’s what the Auror’s will figure out.” Remus said softly and Draco scoffed making Sirius wonder what it was they had been asking him about.

They were quiet for a while, watching Harry as he slept; Sirius focused on the rise and fall of his godson’s chest, looking expectantly at the healer as he came to the foot of the bed and cast a few charms, causing numbers to hover in the air above the man. “All okay.” The healer soothed, “he’s doing really well.”

“How long will it take him to wake up?” Remus asked quietly.

The healer gave a small shrug, “Each patient is different but from the amount of sedation we gave I’d say we should start seeing signs of him being more awake within the next hour but it could be much longer than that before he actually wakes up and speaks to you.”

Remus nodded, “And when can he go home?”

“Most likely tomorrow, he’s mostly here for observation now because of the sedation we gave.” The man replied as he finished documenting the observations on a chart and the numbers vanished from above Harry. “And how are you feeling?” He asked Draco.

“I’m fine.” He said shortly, sounding anything but and the healer frowned at him for a moment before giving a small nod and moving back over to where his superior was scrawling in Harry's notes. Draco’s shoulders slumped, his jaw clenching as he stared down at Harry and Sirius wondered if he should say something, offer some words of support maybe, but before he had the chance the door opened and Tonks stepped inside.

Her gaze focused on Harry for a second before she moved over to the healers and started a quiet conversation, nodding occasionally, a few moments later she thanked them and walked over to the bed. “Do you know what Harry was up to today?”

“He said he was getting lunch in Diagon Alley with Hermione and Neville.” Remus said quietly.

Tonks gave a little nod, “He flooed in from the Leaky Cauldron about fifteen minutes before you flooed in.” She told Draco who gave a little whine and closed his eyes.

“Draco?” Remus asked, his voice soft and his eyes full of concern as he looked at the boy.

Draco opened his eyes slowly, the expression on his face one of pure distress. “I… I was going to go earlier but I… I didn’t know if I should because we’ve seen each other every day this week and I thought he might want space. I… This is my fault, I should have got there sooner!”

Sirius frowned, he’d never really thought about how Draco saw his relationship with Harry, or how new it all was. He shook his head, looking at the man, “You can’t think like that.” He said quietly, “It’s lucky you got there when you did. The only person to blame is whoever cursed that quill.” He swallowed hard, fighting back the urge to cry.

“Sirius is right.” Tonks nodded, “And we’re going to do everything we can to find out who that was.” She said grimly. “Now Harry didn’t see fit to mention your relationship to me so I will need to ask you -”

“I already spoke to your friends.” Draco said, his voice bitter.

“Yes. But as I’m sure you can tell they’re a bit slow.” Tonks gave a small smile which wasn’t returned, “I just want to speak to you both together, when Harry’s a bit better.” Draco continued to frown but Sirius could see where his cousin was coming from. The boy who lived being in a relationship with an ex death eater was significant. “I need to talk to Hermione and Neville, in case they saw anything in Diagon Alley. Let me know when he wakes enough to talk.” Tonks told the healer who nodded, “and I’ll catch up with you guys tomorrow.” She added, nodding to Sirius who attempted a smile.

He felt Remus shift behind him as Tonks left and a few moments later the man moved and followed her; Sirius swallowed back his irritation, focusing instead on Harry, and on Draco whose eyes were filled with tears he was furiously blinking back. “He’ll be alright. He’s tough.”

“Yeah.” Draco breathed, sniffing loudly and swiping at his eyes before he leant forward and placed his hand on top of Harry’s bandaged one, “When he wants to be.” He added with a soft laugh and Sirius smiled his agreement.

He watched silently as Draco’s fingers stroked across Harry’s arm above the bandage; the man’s sleeve had slid up and Sirius could make out the black ink of the dark mark against his pale skin and felt his breath catch in his throat as he saw the scars that marred him; the largest and thickest ran vertically down his arm and through the mark, ending at Draco’s palm and Sirius felt a sickening realisation that it, along with the thinner horizontal marks, were deliberate. As if noticing his gaze Draco looked up at him before his eyes flickered down to his arm and he pulled it back from Harry’s hand, shrugging his robe sleeve down and closing his eyes briefly before he looked up, his eyes avoiding Sirius’ own, “It’s getting late, I should go.” He said quietly, “I’ll come back in the morning before work.”

Sirius swallowed; he wanted to ask what had happened, when and why and whether Harry knew but he knew it wasn’t his place, wasn’t his business, so instead he nodded, “If they let him out tomorrow then I want Harry to come and stay at ours for a bit. You’re more than welcome to come over.”

“Thank you.” Draco murmured in reply, his voice catching slightly and he turned away, focusing his gaze on Harry.

“I’ll uh… let you say goodbye.” Sirius said, moving away and out of the room.

.-*-*-*-.

Remus and Tonks were stood in the corridor talking quietly, their heads together, his husband looked panicked as he saw Sirius walking over and for a second he wondered what he was interrupting until Remus asked after Harry, “He’s fine. Just letting Draco say goodbye.” Sirius said, smiling and trying to push away the flicker of guilt for doubting the man.

“Remus is concerned that Harry’s not safe here.” Tonks said quietly, “I’m happy to leave one of the newbies here overnight if you’d like, but I’m not convinced there’s a risk.”

“There’s no need. I’m staying with him.” Sirius said.

“The hospital says -”

“I’m staying.” Sirius repeated, cutting across his husband and scowling as he and Tonks shared a look. “I won’t leave him here. Why don’t you think it’s a risk?” He asked his cousin.

“It doesn’t fit with the way he’s been attacked so far. I think the person targeting him is too much of a coward to actually do it themselves.” Tonks said quietly and Sirius nodded, starting to understand where she was coming from. “How long have he and Draco been together.”

“A month I think. We only found out this week.” Sirius told her, stepping to the side as a healer pushed an elderly man in a wheelchair past them.

Tonks watched them until they were up the corridor before turning back to Sirius, “A while after the first attack then.” She said, talking more to herself, “I’m not sure it’s related at all, but obviously we’ll double check. In case them being together has upset anyone.”

Sirius shook his head, “No one knows. Not really.”

“Yeah, I figured. And I really don’t think it’s that. Harry uh… he had a note in his pocket, another one of the ones he was sent at the start of the summer. We’re tracing it as best we can but so far all we know is that a postal owl delivered it on tuesday morning.”

Remus gave a low groan at that, leaning against the corridor wall, “He was upset on tuesday, really upset. I thought it was just because of our argument but…” He trailed off, his hand coming up ro run through his hair.

“What did the note say?” Sirius asked, not sure he wanted to know.

Tonks pursed her lips for a second before she sighed, “It said ‘you should have died’.” She murmured and Sirius sucked in a sharp breath, turning away and trying to push back the wave of nausea. “We will catch whoever’s doing this.” Tonks said quietly, her hand coming to rest on Sirius’ forearm.

He let himself relax into it for a second, to take comfort from the touch before he remembered himself and pulled away sharply, “Might be easier if you were actually doing your job instead of standing here having cosy chats with Remus.” He snapped, ignoring his partner’s sharp intake of breath.

Tonks looked as though he had slapped her but to her credit she simply nodded, “I’d better get to Hermione’s before she goes to bed.” She turned away, moving down the corridor before she paused and turned back to them, “Just… Keep me updated, and give him my love when he wakes up.”

“We will do.” Remus replied and the woman gave a small nod before leaving through the large double doors, letting them swing closed behind her. “Sirius…”

Whatever Remus was going to say was cut off as Sirius’ legs finally gave up on him and he sank down onto one of the plastic chairs lined against the wall, pressing his palms into his eye sockets and trying to resist the urge to vomit. He felt Remus sit down beside him, the man’s hand resting on his back a moment later and Sirius choked back a sob, tears trickling down his cheeks.

“Why didn’t he tell us about the note?” He asked, dragging his hand across his cheeks and across the bottom of his dripping nose, snorting as Remus handed him a handkerchief.

“He probably didn’t want to worry us. You know how he is - always trying to keep us safe.” Remus murmured, his hand moving in soothing circles on Sirius’ back as the man blew his nose.

Sirius let out a huff, “Stupid kid.” He muttered and Remus laughed.

“Draco looks a mess.” The man said after a moment, scuffing his shoe against the white floor and making a small black line. Sirius hummed in agreement, wondering if he should mention the marks he had seen before deciding it wasn’t his place and standing up.

“Merlin I hate this.” He muttered, “I just feel so useless!” He moved across the corridor, leaning his head against the wall on front of him and banging it lightly in frustration.

“You do realise that you’re headbutting a poster about genital warts?” Came a voice from his left and he turned, raising an eyebrow at Draco who was regarding him cooly, all traces of the emotion he had shown at Harry’s bedside now gone. Sirius shrugged, not knowing what to say, and Draco turned away, handing a small slip of parchment to Remus, “Can you floo me if anything changes please? I’ll be back first thing.”

“Of course.” Remus promised and Draco gave a small nod of thanks before turning to leave.

Without thinking about it Sirius reached out and grabbed the man’s arm making Draco flinch backwards and yank it away. He looked scared suddenly and it took a second for Sirius to realise that he was expecting him to comment on the scars. “Go be with friends tonight. Look after yourself yeah?.” Sirius said, feeling his throat tighten again.

“I’m fine.” Draco said quietly, his face expressionless as he walked away. Sirius wrinkled his lips, briefly wondering if he should follow the man and check on him for Harry’s sake, before deciding against it.

“Should get back to Harry.” He said and Remus nodded, pulling himself up from the chair with what looked like considerable difficulty. “And you should get home to rest.”

“So should you.” Remus countered; Sirius chose to ignore that and instead walked back into Harry’s room.

.-*-*-*-.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I’m really sorry for the wait, this past year has been pretty rough and I lost my motivation for a while. But I’m back; thanks for all the kudos and comments and for sticking around.


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